A New Idea...And a Cold Drink of Water

A New Idea…
And a Cold Drink of Water

A new idea is a stick of dynamite. It can get you killed, especially in small towns.

Fond memories of the little town of my youth include this oft-recited myth:

“A new idea and a cold drink of water, taken together, will kill you.”

It swirled in the “dust devils” that transplanted the topsoil and shimmered in the “heat monkeys” that rose from asphalt roads turned liquid in the stifling summer meltdowns. It was preached on every corner and in every church, not so much in words, but in the winks, the nods, the habits and thought patterns inbred into generation after incestuous generation.

Dangerous, you say? Why? Because new ideas step on toes, change things, and tend to upset the status quo, the perceived, predictable and traditional ways of doing things. If anyone were foolish enough to attempt to upset a small-town status quo or the existing power structure, fresh rope would suddenly appear, and the hapless innovator would receive swift recompense administered by local white-hooded vigilantes.

A hot air balloon rose from a field in France, observed by Alexander Graham Bell and a friend. It floated over some trees, coming rest in a field tended by peasants with pitchforks, whereupon it was violently assaulted, collapsing lifelessly in the loess. The friend asked Dr. Bell, “Now what good was that hot air balloon experiment?” Dr. Bell replied, “What good is any new-born baby?”

My mother was always trying new ideas to get me to eat liver. She pleaded in her best logic, “But son, it’s good for you”. She soon learned that logic is not the best motivator of stupid kids. Her last attempt to trick me into eating that foul meat went sideways on her. Its malodorous stench hung in the humid air for blocks in our neighborhood, and people fled their homes, gasping for breath. That episode finally broke her will, and she abandoned all further ideas and efforts of trickery.

My grandmother had better luck with the squash. She had baked it in lemon skins, and it was terrific, to which I said, “Jewel (that was her name, and she was one helluva cook!), this is the best baked lemon I ever ate.” Like I said, kids may be stupid, but good food overcomes logic every time! I love squash to this day, and still hate liver.

One Sunday, my mother in tow, I revisited after some 20 year’s absence the little Methodist Church of my youth. We sat in the second row left, near the altar. After the service, two elderly ladies rushed up to me, saying, “Bud, we barely recognized you…you were not in your usual place.” I guess I still looked stupid, so they said, “Your place was always…always…in the back right, not the front left.” There you have it…the status quo, alive and well…and me, a revolutionary iconoclast!

I suppose I should have told them that while in my Atlanta Methodist Church I had swallowed a new idea, and it seemed to be working. Repentance is one of those “new ideas”, you know, and it always has an Audience. I had changed my mind about some things, so that now I actually enjoy sitting up front, lower left, as close to the action as I can get.

Thomas A. Edison experimented with over 1,000 gas combinations to find one that worked in the electric light bulb. Before success arrived, he was asked, “Dr. Edison, have you failed?” He replied, “No, I have succeeded in finding 1,000 combinations that won’t work.” You are reading this now because his new idea continues to explode in the face of status quo darkness.

Historical events, like our recent election, often do not “create” new paradigms as much as they “reveal” new eras, pregnant with possibilities. Our President-elect took some new ideas, swallowed them with a big gulp of cold water, and burst headlong into history. So long, status quo!

We have the choice: nurture the new, or rot in the ruins of a crumbling status quo…we can’t do both. Do you have a new idea? Then fill the glass, slug it down…and light the fuse!

Bud
November 13, 2008